ARGGHHHH SPENCER RAGE
OK SOOOOO he doesn’t like me. blah , what ever ill deal. but for now I’m baby sitting so i can’t have things get in the way of my job. blah blah fuck my life
So…
I want to make a mix tape for the guy i like, does that sound like a good idea or would that be a bit too much?
People are screwed up in this world. I’d rather be with someone screwed up and open about it than somebody perfect and ready to explode.
(Source: eatsleepdraw)
This is my Ex Boyfriend Gaston. I really miss him at times. I can’t believe he blocked me on Facebook… He said that he never loved me and that i wasn’t wanted by him anymore. fuck that shit… Why do guys keep hurting me? I don’t understand what i did or do wrong… maybe one day ill figure things out and find a nice guy. i mean I’ve found one but the problem is that i don’t know if feelings are mutual and if they ever will be. Ugh this is the worst feeling. feeling worthless…
I wanted you to hate me, because I already hated myself.
I wanted you to hurt me, because i don’t feel like i deserve any better.
I can’t get over how much hate that i have towards myself, maybe thats why i can’t hate anyone else. I feel like I’m a lost little girl that has been abandoned by her parents. that sounds spot on. fuck my fucking life.
These are my siblings :) I miss them so much, I’m really sad that i don’t live with them but it is for the best. I’m not really on good terms with my real mother and my dad… who knows where my dad is. fuck him. anyway i have come to terms with the fact that i don’t have many pictures of cassie (she’s in none of the pictures above). she doesn’t want to even talk to me anymore… i don’t know what i did wrong. Im the oldest of 5 and all i do is give and give but i never really get anything in return. it kinda sucks major dick. I love them all none the less :D they make my life worth living everyday even when i don’t get to see them or talk to them.
Sigh…
I think I’m just one big mess of emotions…
